I take out the card to read it again only to find out it is already imprinted in my memorial circuits: "Andy The Red - Tarot Reading - Red Magic - Zen Tower - 8th floor" in crimson letter over a watermark of a gold dragon kissing a silver phoenix. I move the card between my fingers to give me time to think it over again. How can I be so sure ? I let my mind wander back to last Wednesday in the library. I was searching the shelves for an hidden copy of the Ars Erotica Magnus when the card suddenly appeared in front of my eyes. No other way to describe this. It was not there before and all of a sudden, it just popped up from under an old book.
A very new business card inside an old derelict book ? It was so weird I should have just dropped it but I was already fascinated by the design of it. Looking at it again, it reinforces my first impression of sensuality and power coming from it. No wonder I did research for this zen tower but no small coincidence that there is one in the city only a few blocks from my small flat.
I consider the shining new building with a sense of awe. Exotic woods and enamel panels with a shippy overlook that brings both a sense of peace and dizziness. Not at all what I would have put behind the word Zen originally bu tnow that I am looking at it for such a long time, I am starting to understand how they can be linked.
I put the card back in my pocket and reach the entry phone without further ado. The Tibetan bell ringing that emanates from it take me completely by surprise. I jerk back my finger as if stung and breathe heavily to let my heart resume a normal pace...

I have had a sleepless night… strange dreams, images in my head I cannot understand or figure out…
I’m feeling restless, I walk aimlessly though the flat, trying to put my finger on what it is that is making me feel this way.
I walk into the kitchen, put the kettle on…
Aralia is purring by my side, I feed her. And sit at the kitchen table, with a cup of tea.
There are images in my head… Blurry, but also a very strong feeling… a presence is near, not from this time, in fact a timeless presence… but I can’t see beyond…
I go back into the living room; I draw the curtains and let the sunshine pour in…
Suddenly I remember the runes, I feel they are calling me, I haven’t read them in quite a while, but now I feel they have something to tell me. I take them out of the leather bag and pick one…
Rune 17… Teiwaz… powerful… named after Tyr, the God.
The rune is telling me that I have to trust the energies that have been passed on me from my ancestral stream. It tells me to target my energies in the single most correct place, just as the arrow or spear symbolized by the rune must… It also tells me that I will be needed soon, to help someone, it has to do with self-sacrifice, in the sense of silencing the I, and I feel this someone is not me… I hold the rune in my hand, I feel the softness of the stone, I feel the energy of Teiwaz flooding through my veins, I close my eyes, breathe in deep. I put the rune back.
I need a shower, to shake off the laziness that this sleepless night has left in my body… A long shower, I have plenty of time, I’m not expecting anybody until late in the afternoon… The water feels wonderful on my skin, like tiny little needles pricking on my shoulders…
I can still sense this presence.
I put on the dark red silk robe, and stay barefoot; I need to feel the ground today. The spring weather is wonderful, so I don’t dry my hair…
I stand by the window I watch the city from above, let my thoughts wander…
Suddenly I hear the bell ring… my heart is about to burst, I wasn’t expecting anybody…
I head for the door…

Bon. Il est presque 7h plus personne ne viendra maintenant. C'est le moment d'y aller. Je vais fermer et rentrer chez moi prendre un bon bain. J'ai vraiment besoin de me détendre ce soir. Je passe mentalement mon carnet d'adresses en revue pour trouver la perle rare qui serait adapté à mon état d'esprit. Personne. Merde qui c'est qui rentre à cette heure. Un gamin en plus. Il va me faire perdre mon temps pour rien acheter au final. Humm. Il est pas si mal pour un jeunot. Si Nat était là, je parierais avec elle qu'il est encore puceau.

Bon. Il est presque 7h plus personne ne viendra maintenant. C'est le moment d'y aller. Je cherche à contrôler mes mains qui tremblent d'émotion devant ce risque que je prends. Mais c'est l'occasion ou jamais: elle m'a invité chez elle pour la saint valentin et ses parents seront partis pour tout le week-end à Venise. Si j'arrive à lui faire ce cadeau, je suis sur qu'elle acceptera de me montrer comment il lui va. Et ensuite... Je sens tout mon corps qui réagit à l'image de Caroline pratiquement nue devant moi. Allez je pousse la porte avec une grande respiration. La boutique s'appelle Caroline Lingerie, je suis sur que cela va me porter chance.